Tribune/Debra Reid - Jessie Nerey helps Jared Acevedo, 8, hit the ball during a tesson class. Nerey is a senior student at Spanish Springs High School.
But as long as kids need his help, it's a necessary burden.
"I don't care what other people think," Ed Feinhandler, 61, said recently at his Sparks home.
Feinhandler, otherwise known as "Ugly Ed," doesn't worry if other people question his motives or sanity. For 13 years, he has coached, hugged and entertained hundreds of other people's kids – mostly on his own dime. It's been worth it, he says, even if only a few of his students succeed in escaping poverty.
He helps young people like Litzia Martinez, a 17-year-old senior at Spanish Springs High School. Feinhandler has mentored her since she was in first grade.
“He’s taught me to stay focused and that I can have nice things if I work hard,” Martinez said. “He’s had a big impact on me and, through thick and thin, he’s been there for my family.”
She has a 3.7 grade point average and wants to go to college to become a heart surgeon.
To keep his relationships with kids like Litzia, the Sparks man says his door is always open for youngsters who need a safe place or just an escape from home.
"Why not? My house has air conditioning, games, a computer," Feinhandler said.
Piles of school supplies and packaged food clutter the floor of his Sparks condominium. Upstairs are board games and a large bed. Feinhandler said he recently allowed six children to spend the night.
But he admits there are snags that accompany his hospitality.
One time, while playing with a phone, a boy accidentally called 911, drawing a Sparks police officer to investigate. The officer found no problems and Feinhandler said he appreciated the visit.
"He (the officer) did a fine job and I was happy he responded but it was a waste of time as the boy admitted it was a mistake, one of the perils of taking care of underprivileged youth that don't comprehend too readily," Feinhandler said in a recent e-mail.
The man moving the rock
Feinhandler, a longtime Nevada resident, first served his country before he began working with youth and is well-acquainted with Nevada since he grew up in Elko. He was drafted and served briefly in the Vietnam War before he was discharged for a bad knee.
In 1988, he retired from his sales management job at Munichem Corp. and was hired as a part-time basketball coach at Little Flower School. Feinhandler laughed about his stint as a Jewish coach at a Catholic grade school.
"The priest asked if I wanted to go to a weekend retreat," Feinhandler said. "I said, ‘No, you already have my representative there – Jesus!’ ”
Later, Feinhandler coached basketball and tennis at Bishop Manogue High School and then Sparks High School for 10 years. In 1999, Feinhandler had surgery to replace both knees. His metal knees will hurt for the rest of his life, he said.
In 2009, Feinhandler was named the senior division volunteer of the year for the state of Nevada by the Points of Light Foundation. He has never married and has no children of his own.
Instead, he invests his resources into other kids and they, in effect, have become his surrogate children and he uses his own experiences to encourage others in the community who fight for a similar cause, such as Roberto Nerey, who helps teen gang members. Nerey has been pushing for a new youth center in the Montello Street neighborhood.
"His heart's in the right place,” Feinhandler said. “Roberto has lived that bottom life and he knows what it's like. He's trying his best to turn their lives around. Once (teens) get involved in that no-hope feeling, it destroys them from the inside. I tell Roberto, ‘Keep up your hopes and dreams for these kids because they don't have any.’ "
A drive for teens
Feinhandler’s true calling for the youth began in 1997, when he began dreaming about starting a free tennis program for underprivileged kids.
"I closed my eyes and asked God,” Feinhandler said. “I said, ‘I've had a great life. I'm going to stop second-guessing the thoughts in my head and just go for it.’ ”
But his resources were limited; Feinhandler had only three tennis rackets. So he called around until a company back east agreed to help.
"Prince Sports, Inc. has been sending rackets for 13 years – they just sent 12 more,” he said.
Making his vision a reality, Feinhandler created the Huey Feinhandler Foundation/Northern Nevada Youth Opportunistic Tennis Program. "Huey" stands for Ugly Ed (U and E) surrounded by the “happiness of youth” (H and Y). He uses the program to help students and the free tennis lessons are "the draw for me to find out what their (the kids) needs are," he said.
The "other needs" are endless – computers, medical, household and school supplies, swimming lessons and food. He frequently asks his students when they have last eaten. This may result in a trip to Pizza Plus or Baskin-Robbins.
It helps Feinhandler get his foot in the door with the teens in need of a mentor, but it comes at a great financial price. Even with the discounts restaurants give him, Feinhandler estimates he's spent $2,500 to $3,000 on pizza and ice cream this year.
"Some families have no food in the house," Feinhandler said. "When I say there's starving children in northern Nevada, there are. There's wonderful little kids going to bed hungry. We're in the 21st century and that shouldn't be happening."
Feinhandler said the number of families lacking the essentials is growing.
"Families are coming out of the woodwork and I can't help them,” he said.
Establishing boundaries
In the process of working with the youth, Feinhandler has learned to set his own limits.
"I told them (teens), ‘If you get pregnant or go to jail, don't call me,’ ” he said. "Somewhere along the line, I have to put a stop to what I'm doing."
When his students hit the age of 17 or 18, he expects them to get a job and to help themselves and their families.
"The families are uneducated – teens having babies with guys that leave them," Feinhandler said. "The thinking process in these houses – the mother has kids and father goes to jail. There's no one to tell them it's wrong."
Feinhandler sometimes has to give up and let go of a student. Joaquin Rios, 16, was in the tennis program but now is far away from his family, who live in Sun Valley, and was incarcerated in January for stealing a car in a gang-related incident. He’s now serving time at a ranch until he turns 18.
"He left my tennis program; I kicked him out because he'd misbehave," Feinhandler said. "He wouldn't take my advice."
Fighting for hope
Out of the hundreds of children he's worked with, Feinhandler said only five or six have made the attempt to go on to college or trade school. Natalie Marinas is attending the University of Nevada, Reno. Chris Martinez, Litzia Martinez’s 21-year-old brother, also attends UNR and has earned a U.S. Tennis Association scholarship.
Litzia Martinez said Feinhandler has given her the encouragement to try to new sports, as well as tennis.
“He’s been helpful when my family couldn’t afford sports equipment,” said the current gymnast and volleyball, soccer and tennis player.
“I don’t think I would have tried new sports (if it weren’t for Ed),” she said. “I would have limited myself and I wouldn’t have expanded my mind.”
Other students now return to help out with the tennis program. Christopher "Cookie Man" Cook, a 26-year-old who has cerebral palsy, is Feinhandler's assistant coach. Oriana Rios, 13, helps out with the little kids.
"I'm fighting tooth and nail to give these kids some kind of direction and the benefits of education, " Feinhandler said. "But my energy level is dropping. It's getting to be too much for one person."
When asked why he hasn't recruited other volunteer tennis coaches, Feinhandler said a few have offered to help but they don't show up.
"Talk is cheap and they have never shown up to help," Feinhandler added.
Trusting other adults with his students is another issue for Feinhandler.
"I also have a problem with trusting other adults with the children and making sure that they treat them like kids and don't rob them of their innocence," he said.
Sometimes his job is overwhelming but Feinhandler finds a way. Up to a dozen of his kids have signed up for swimming lessons this fall and Feinhandler says he needs $140 ($14 per student) to cover the cost. He also had 85 students waiting for school supplies.
"I've got a girl who's going to be a junior at Sparks High who needs a scientific calculator for an Advanced Placement math class," Feinhandler said. “"She wants to go to college and maybe teach.”
He's known the girl since she was in eighth grade. The girl's single-parent family can't afford the calculator's cost of more than $100.
When he’s able to help, such expenses add up in Feinhandler’s pocketbook. Currently, he has $80,000 in credit card debt and is in the process of loan mitigation.
"They've raised the rates on my maxed-out credit cards," he said.
But the tennis program continues to grow. A dozen kids in his own condo complex want Feinhandler to give them tennis lessons. The tennis courts, which long have been unused, needed nets so Feinhandler ordered them "on my own nickel."
"I feel like everything that I do is what God wants me to do,” he said. “It's been working out. If you got trouble, come see me – you let me know.”
Feinhandler’s work has caught the eye of local businesses and Sen. Harry Reid. Reid recently told Feinhandler his staff would look into grants for the Huey Feinhandler Foundation. He is also appreciative of the support of local businesses who provide items and equipment for the youth. Greenbrae Trophy Center, for example, donates tennis trophies and engraving. The Northtowne Lane Baskin Robbins provides discounts and always welcomes Feinhandler and his students. Banana Boat of California supplies sun-screen and Save Mart supplies ice and water for the summer. Sports Authority provides discounts on sports equipment. Prince Sports, Inc. continues to supply tennis rackets and other equipment.
While the youth benefit from these materials, ultimately, it’s their mentor who gains their trust and grants them the self-confidence they need to grow into young adults.
“He’s seriously one of the most unselfish people I’ve ever met,” Chris Martinez said. “He teaches you a lot and prepares you for life.”
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