Regardless of the answer or what our rational minds tell us, the minutes immediately before any kind of medical procedure can seem like excruciating hours. Kind of like watching the clock at 11:59 before a midnight execution or at 4:59 on a Friday afternoon.
This paralyzing fear knows no age: Moms and dads can feel it just as easily as kids. Most of us associated it with being in a dentist’s chair as the masked torturer of teeth prepares a series of drills and scraping devices that are somehow supposed to be good for us. It is the fear of the unknown misery ahead that keep patients sweating as they lay there protected by only a flimsy paper bib until the practitioner of pain leans over and says, “Open wide.”
These thoughts ran through my mind as I sat on a table at Family First Chiropractic in Sparks on Friday morning. It was my follow-up visit to an appointment a week earlier at which I was examined for spine and muscular issues that apparently afflict much of the population. I had no problems to speak of, at least none that I knew about. The reason for my visit was simply to sacrifice my body and peace of mind in order to do a little first-hand reporting so my faithful readers might learn what chiropractic medicine is and how it works.
Going into this, I certainly had only a vague idea about it. Through the grapevine I had heard that it was great, and I had also heard it was bunk. No one close to me leaned either way, so when I was approached about doing a story I felt I could go into it with no prejudices, other than a generally sarcastic view of life.
Last week, I recounted the details of my initial visit and exam. Despite my tale of alien-like scanning devices and furniture designed during the Inquisition, I left without a scratch or shred of discomfort. My visit with Dr. Cliff Fischer and his staff was pleasant, though it wasn’t until my follow-up visit that I actually learned some things. Upon arrival, I sat down with my coffee in Fischer’s office to watch an introductory video on chiropractic. It was informative, talking about how chiropractic medicine works to ensure proper functioning of the nervous system and how poor alignment of the spine can affect our body’s electrical impulses. The video also talked about how patients can use chiropractic treatment to the point of relieving pain or other symptoms or they can use it to the point of wellness, which means coming even when you feel good to prevent problems later, comparing it to brushing your teeth.
“Can’t I just buy a tube of spinal paste and brush it morning and night?” I wondered.
After the video, Fischer showed me pictures of my neck and spine that were taken the week before. He told me some of the vertebrae in my neck were too close together and that my neck didn’t have as much curve as it should. Funny, because I always thought my neck curved too much. It must be my large Adam’s apple.
The diagnosis wasn’t all bad: I have good spacing between three vertebrae in my lower back. Also funny, since my lower back has always been a little painful for me. Not to mention that I have always had sitting jobs.
Our sedentary lifestyle is one of the major factors of people’s spinal problems, Fischer and his partner, Dr. Rick Swecker, told me. Swecker also said too much sugar and starch are a big problem, as I took a swig of my coffee loaded with sugar and cream. Two tablespoons of sugar decreases immune function for up to four hours, which lowers the body’s resistance to many diseases, including cancer, he said. Based on my sugar intake that morning, I’d be a walking disease bag by noon.
Most of what the two doctors told me makes perfect sense: Eat right, exercise and generally be well. Oh, and come for regular adjustments. Actually, they said people can come to them as little or as much as they want. Fischer and Swecker said people can benefit from regular or periodic visits. Most insurance will cover a certain amount of chiropractic care, Fischer said, though at between $45 and $60 per visit people who continue after insurance stops won’t necessarily go broke. Most of us spend more than that on fast food in a week, which is money that would be better spent anyplace else.
For my body, Fischer recommended some adjustments over a period of months. As our interview was wrapping up, I closed my notebook and prepared to leave, thinking that my first adjustment would come next week, so I’d have time to mentally prepare for this new, possibly painful experience. Swecker said 95 percent of adjustments were not painful for the patient, but what I heard was that 5 percent of adjustments will hurt like hell. Despite my horror, I smiled and agreed.
So I sat on the table and waited for about 13 hours as bloodcurdling screams emanated from adjacent rooms. Or maybe it was five minutes and that noise was the air conditioning. Either way, I wondered if perhaps I should make a break for the door rather than risk having my head snapped off.
Then it was time: Fischer came in and had me lie on my side. He described what he was doing, as if that made things easier. He positioned his hands on my neck and then POP! The noise was actually the headrest jumping down a few inches, just like he said it would. His hands were on my neck, though I didn’t really feel anything. Then it was done. I sat up and the doc moved me to a recliner to rest for 20 minutes. Then he checked my spine, said I was fine and told me to come back next week for more. That’s when the real pain will start, I’m sure.
Since then I have been a little sore, which Fischer said is normal. They gave me a list of things not to do for 48 hours after my adjustment, most of which are impossible because I would have to take a vacation from work (no extended computer work or holding the phone to your shoulder) and then not enjoy it (no sleeping in or bicycling or bowling). But I’ll do my best.
I’ll let you know in a few months how my chiropractic care is going. All the other patients I saw during my visits seemed happy and doing great, so you’ll either see me looking more fit than ever or I’ll be the boneless blob of skin oozing down the street. Either way, it’s my journalistic duty to tell the truth. If you want to learn firsthand, call Family First Chiropractic at 337-0184.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going for a nice, healthy walk to get some coffee with five sugars.
Nathan Orme is the editor of the Sparks Tribune. He can be reached at norme@dailysparkstribune.com.
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